How are you all? I thought I’d send a little note and tell you what’s been happening in my life. Although I’m retired from marathoning I’m still running. Each weekend I drive downtown, park behind RunTex Riverside and run the 10-mile Town Lake Trail counterclockwise starting at mile marker 10. You are all welcome to join me anytime.
I try to start at 7 AM, but this morning I was a little late and started at 7:30 AM. The sun was already up, the temperature was 55-60 and clear. It was a great day for running. I started out slowly, went under Congress Avenue Bridge with the air tinged with the smell of bat guano and finished the first mile in 10:50. Up and over the Riverside hill, cross I35, and back on the trail. I passed several runners who were going the other way. I enjoy seeing other runners in this beautiful pastoral setting with the grass, the ducks, and the lake in the bright sunlight.
Between miles 8 and 7 a group of five runners were coming towards me in the distance. Two gals in the lead and ten feet back two gals and a guy. As they approached I didn’t know the gals, but I saw the guy was my dear running buddy Ed B. So about fifty feet out I yelled hello to Ed and waved. It was very typical of Ed running with the ladies. He’s such a charmer. The two gals passed me, and then the next two did too. Ed had stopped on the trail and looked to be bending over to pick something up. I’m running and I was almost up to Ed when all of a sudden he reaches behind and pulls down his shorts and moons me. Yup, that’s right, Ed B. mooned me in the open on a clear sunny day on the trail in East Austin. Unbelievable! I yelled as I passed that that was a mental picture I’ll never be able to forget unfortunately. TMI – Too much information. Way, way, TMI. As quickly as he did it, it was over, his shorts were up and he was again running and catching up to his group. I laughed for the next three miles. I know, I know. Most of us have seen Ed’s monkey, but ladies and gentlemen I’ve seen a side of Ed that I bet none of you have experienced I hope.
Now for those who haven’t… Ed’s butt is a small, and cute and tight butt – a true runner’s butt. It’s not marbled with fat as a couch potato’s butt. It is a very au-natural butt without a hint of tan. I can’t tell you if it was a clean-shaven butt. I just didn’t have time to focus, but if I had to guess I would say no, because what I know of Ed is that he’s just not that kind of guy. So in summary it looked to me like a fast butt, a well-tuned muscular butt, a Boston-qualifying butt.
Now afterwards I am thinking why did he do it to me. What have I done to Ed to show me this special side of himself. I’ve always tried to be polite and friendly to him, but not too friendly. We’re running buddies and that’s special, but not that special. I mean we did run Chicago Marathon together, but he was miles ahead of Kevin and me. Now you’ve got to understand that I have held and squeezed his monkey. I’ve even laughed at his monkey as he pulled it out at races and stretched it to its full length. Did this somehow encourage him? I hope not. I am bewildered.
So to all my running buddies past, present and future, if you are running and see Ed in the distance approaching please be prepared for him to take a butt-shot of you. For me next time I run Town Lake Trail I plan on bringing a camera.